|
Saturday, March 20, 2004
MOVIES X NEWS: ALL OUT ATTACK
Hello peeps, not too much to report as of late but here’s what I could piece together in a mostly Asia-related update.
Whether you like him or not, Quentin Tarantino deserves a little bit of credit, having put pressure on Miramax to release the long-awaited Hero, according to Fangoria and CHUD. Miramax bought the international distribution rights to the film by acclaimed director Zhang Yimou, and then sat on the film like they have done numerous times before in spite of it receiving a nomination for best foreign film at last years’ Academy Awards. Only released in Asia, rumour and had been rife of reediting, numerous alleged release dates came and went, and it seemed that Miramax bought the film just because they could and that they had no intention of releasing it. Enter Tarantino, who has declared the film a masterpiece and has heaped the pressure on his good buddies at Miramax to release the film, with a “Quentin Tarantino Presents” deal added. The director alleges the film will be released untouched (though still probably in the shortened theatrical print that has been seen in Asia, which Miramax forced to start with) with his name at the top, in an attempt to get some added publicity one would assume. The current release date is pencilled in for August 20th. “Its pretty much what I did for Iron Monkey” says Tarantino, forgetting that Iron Monkey was re-scored and cut! DUH!
More from Andrew Lau (via MonkeyPeaches) on the Infernal Affairs remake, that the police chief and crime boss characters essayed by Anthony Wong and Eric Tsang in the original will not be present in the new version. Emphasis will now be put on the two moles themselves, though one wonders who they’ll give their information to considering their police and triad contacts no longer exist! It just gets better and better doesn’t it? The plan still seems to be pitting the police against Irish terrorists too, genius.
Also from MonkeyPeaches comes news of a new movie from Infernal Affairs star Andy Lau called Jiang Hu. In it Lau plays a big Triad boss in the early 1990s who wants out, but his desire to escape his criminal life puts him in great danger. A rumour circulates that someone he trusts wants him dead, and that young killer Edison Chen with the help of his friend Shawn Yu will kill him in 12 hours. Could his old friend Jackie Cheung be the one behind his impending demise? This is produced by Eric Tsang and is directed by Wong Ching Po, who previously helmed the ultra low-budget Fu Bo, a most sinister little movie that Tsang made a cameo appearance in. As long as the utterly dreadful Edison Chen is on screen for as little time as possible this might be good.
John Woo has talked about a new project he wishes to work on, according again to Monkey Peaces. Describing it as “[an] action-musical about an American gangster with great dance moves” he is seeking Hugh Jackman to play the lead role as he has recently wowed audiences on Broadway with his portrayal of Peter Allen in The Boy From Oz. The story is set in 1930 and concerns the criminal rise of a lowly hood to head of his gang, romancing a dancing instructor and a crime boss’ mistress along the way. Jude Law is also in line for a role in the movie, though for a movie like this he’s just too damn pretty.
CHUD reveals that Kevin Smith is eyeing up Jake Gyllenhall (Donnie Darko) for the lead role in the upcoming Green Hornet movie. Smith recently mentioned at a junket for the doomed Jersey Girl that he was looking for a younger actor who had never done action before, and Jake is top of his list. Considering that Big Kev is new to action himself, I guess he wants to make sure nobody involved in the film knows what the hell they’re doing.
Fans of Ryuhei Kitamura’s Versus are either going to be overjoyed or puzzled at the news that a new Ultimate Edition complete with newly filmed scenes and additional music is due out on DVD in Japan on May 21st. While the extra scenes could be cool, this film was a tad on the long side to begin with. Unless you’re an insane DVD collector I’d wait for another release, as the plentiful extras probably won’t have any subtitles and as usual the Japanese R2 disc will cost a fortune.
Casshern is a name you’re probably going to hear a lot about in the next few months. Due for release next month in Japan, according KFC Cinema this is a Japanese/Korean co-production based on the 70’s anime New Superhero Casshern which told the story of Tetsuya, a human transferred into the body of a power android in order to take on the evil android forces created by his well-meaning father. Directed by photographer and video director Kiriya Kazuaki, the official site includes numerous images and a trailer which look totally kick-ass. This has the potential to be huge as neither Japan or Korea seem to have the same problems putting money into sci-fi that Hollywood does (with the odd exception), this promises to be massive. I’ll keep you posted on all developments. If anybody else has any more details on this please do get in touch with me through martin @ oracleswar.com, I’m really interested in this one.
Kung Fu Cinema has supplied an interesting link to a short clip from Jet Li’s latest movie Danny the Dog. The clip is a non-action comedy moment where Jet’s character has his first encounter with ice cream. After some disappointing stuff from Jet’s adventures in Hollywood, hopes have to be high for this one.
And that’s all we have time for this time folks. Thanks for reading, check out my website if you like through the link below, and have yourselves a good day.
Martin Leggett
posted by Martin 8:12 AM | Comments
Thursday, March 18, 2004
THE FOYWONDER'S SCHLOCK REPORT FOR 3-18-04
Sequels you don't want, someone else thinks Paris Hilton can act, George Clooney stars in everything, NBC wants to destroy California, and an eyeful of Man-Thing! All this and more in today's Schlock Report so let's get on with it already!
How about for a change of pace we kick things off with a bit of news about a movie that may actually prove good? It was confirmed yesterday that Tom Cruise and Steven Spielberg are teaming up again for another science fiction blockbuster – a remake of WAR OF THE WORLDS. Whether or not this version of WAR OF THE WORLDS will be set in Victorian England like the original H.G. Welles novel or modernized as was the classic 1953 George Pal movie version remains to be seen. This much is known, David Koepp, who wrote the screenplays for JURASSIC PARK and SPIDER-MAN, is currently doing a rewrite of the script and the film is already scheduled to begin shooting in late 2005 for a possible summer 2006 release date. The guy that reports the news for JoBloDotCom made an interesting observation. “Why do I have the feeling our new generation of moviegoers is going to think this is a remake of INDEPENDENCE DAY?” If you encounter anyone like this and they are over the age of 15 (they should know better by then) then shoot them immediately. The world will be better off.
Okay, back to the crap! CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN 2 is in the works as we speak, so says Variety. I blame you.
And now the moment we’ve all be waiting for… (Drum roll please!) The plot synopsis for MISS CONGENIALITY 2! Yes, we all know you’re hungering for more Sandra Bullock/FBI/beauty pageant comedy and so here you go. "Fresh off her latest investigative coup, Gracie Hart (Sandra Bullock) has become America's sweetheart, the new "face of the Bureau." A glorified public relations mascot, Gracie wants to get back into the field and solve the case when her good friends Cheryl (Heather Burns) and Stan (William Shatner) are abducted. Gracie's "handlers," including the disgruntled Sam Fuller, just want to keep Gracie sidelined while "real" agents solve the case. However, Gracie has different plans..." What? No beauty pageant this time?
I asked this last time but now I’m going to ask it again. Why is Paris Hilton famous and why is she now getting acting gigs? The hard partying hotel heiress turned inexplicable pop culture lynchpin is currently up for a role in a flick called IBIZA, about the hunt to find a young woman who goes missing while vacationing in Ibiza, an anything goes party hotspot in Southern Spain. Hilton is up for the role of the missing party girl (Oh, if only she would go missing!) so at least she’s being cast in a role she’s so familiar with that it won’t take much acting on her part. Madonna’s Maverick Films is producing the movie so now we have yet one more reason to hate her as well.
If the reports are true then George Clooney is attached to star in one out of every ten movies currently in development. Dark Horizons reports a rumor that Paramount wants Clooney to star in their remake of PET SEMETARY playing the role of grieving father Dr. Creed. Also, it looks like Clooney really is set to don the mustache that once made Tom Selleck a sex symbol by starring in a big screen version of MAGNUM P.I. The fact that the film is being written by one of the AUSTIN POWERS writers and that LL Cool J is being tapped to play the role of T.C., Magnum’s helicopter flying buddy, doesn’t interest me in the slightest. Of course that might just be because I never cared to the television series to begin with. UPDATE: Clooney's agent has gone on the record denying the actor's involvement with the MAGNUM P.I. movie so it looks as if he's decided that making just one movie based on an 80's TV show (THE A-TEAM) is enough for him.
Those of you dying to see the new GARFIELD movie (And you know who you are!) are going to have to wait an extra 7 days as the release date has been pushed back to June 11th. Please try to contain your enthusiasm until then.
Wanna get your first sneak peak at what the big screen version of MAN-THING looks like? Check it out here. I don’t know about but that doesn’t look an awful lot like the Man-Thing from the comic books. From what I’ve heard, the monster takes on several forms in the movie even though it doesn’t have very much actual screen time in the movie.
Yes, Virginia, there will be a MORTAL KOMBAT 3. However, the film’s actual title apparently remains up in the air. According to a Mortal Kombat fansite, the current titles be considered are MK – DEVESTATION, MK – DEADLY ALLIANCE, and MK – DECEPTION, this last one also being the rumored title to the next version of the video game. Might I toss out a few choices of my own? How about MK – DESPERATION since the thought of a 3rd movie seems like just that on the part of the producers to milk this franchise? Okay, how about MK – DESOLATION, as in the empty theaters this movie will play in? Or how about a simple title that pretty much sums up what most people think when they hear that another MORTAL KOMBAT movie is actually getting produced – MORTAL KOMBAT 3: WHY?
Ben Affleck stated in an interview that has decided to give up action movies and wants to concentrate more on serious drama and light comedic fare. And I’m supposed to care about this why exactly? I guess this means we’ll never get that REINDEER GAMES sequel we’ve all been waiting for.
Actress Ali Larter of FINAL DESTINATION fame will play the title role in MARIGOLD: AN ADVENTURE IN INDIA, a musical comedy about an American actress who goes to India and gets caught up in the eccentric world of Bollywood. I only mention this here because the last time Hollywood tried to make a movie poking fun at Bollywood it was the Heather Graham stinker THE GURU. I have a lingering feeling this one could turn out just as dreadful. But hopefully it won’t be 3 ˝ hours long like most Bollywood flicks.
For those of you wondering where and when you can see the original 1954 uncut, un-Americanized version of GODZILLA, click here for a list of cities and dates.
This next story is just too damn funny. Are you familiar with a young actor named Robin Dunne? If you’ve ever seen CRUEL INTENTIONS 2, THE SKULLS 2, and AMERICAN PSYCHO 2 then you know who he is. The guy seems hellbent to make a career out of starring in direct-to-video sequels to theatrically released movies. Well, he’s about to add a 4th one to his resume as young Mr. Dunne has signed on for SPECIES 3. You’re the man, Robin! You are the man!
In keeping with DVD news, Media Blasters’ new Guilty Pleasures label will be cranking out a few DVDs later this year that should make Ray Dennis Steckler fans happy. On May 25th, a double feature DVD of his feature BLOOD SHACK along with the director’s alternate cut titled THE CHOOPER hits DVD racks complete with audio commentaries by Steckler himself and Joe Bob Briggs. Then on June 29th, Steckler’s THE HOLLYWOOD STRANGLER MEETS THE SKID ROW SLASHER will be released and it too will feature commentaries by Steckler and Joe Bob. The DVDs will also be loaded with plenty of other extras as well and priced at just $14.95 a piece.
May 25th, 2004. Mark this date on your calendars. Why? Why, you ask? Because that’s when CRUEL INTENTIONS 3 will be released on DVD dammit!
THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW isn’t the only disaster flick coming next month. NBC is planning to debut a four-hour disaster epic miniseries about a cataclysmic earthquake called 10.5 during May sweeps. NYPD Blue’s Kim Delaney is an “intellectual earthquake expert” who comes across evidence that a string of Northwestern earthquakes are leading up to “the big one” that could annihilate the West Coast but of course nobody believes her. Meanwhile, Dukes of Hazzard icon John Schneider and 8 Simple Rules nymph Kaley Cuoco are her ex-husband and her daughter who get themselves trapped in the Pacific Northwest mountains by one of the quakes while out camping. Out to save California are Mr. Eyebrows Beau Bridges as the President of the United States and Remo Williams himself Fred Ward as the head of the Federal Emergency Management Agency. The Seattle Space Needle collapses, the Golden Gate Bridge breaks in half, and the West Coast begins to break apart from the continent. Most importantly, when clips from the blockbuster miniseries were shown to television critics back in January they got laughed out of the building for being cheesy and overly melodramatic. And maybe it has to do with the fact that the solution to stopping the earthquakes involves detonating a series of nuclear warheads. 10.5 is coming to us from NBC, the same network that gave us the dopey giant squid miniseries THE BEAST and Y2K: THE MOVIE, a disaster film so astoundingly bad that it only aired once and never saw the light of day again. Sounds like we have a winner.
Finally today, head on over to the Schlocktoberfest site for me newest Foyeurism entitled DUDE, I AM MY CAR! about one of the goofiest Saturday morning cartoons of all time that does not deserve to be forgotten, TURBO TEEN, which could probably be best described as Speed Racer meets Manimal.
- Scott Foy
posted by Scott 7:32 AM | Comments
Sunday, March 14, 2004
THE FOYWONDER'S SCHLOCK REPORT FOR 3-14-04
Good morning Mr. & Mrs. Fanboy and all the geeks at sea…let’s go to press!
There are many great mysteries in the universe that will probably forever remain unanswered. For example, why exactly is Paris Hilton famous? Or in this case, why is Paris Hilton being offered acting roles? When did Paris Hilton learn to act? Does Paris Hilton know how to act? So many questions that go unanswered. Regardless, it looks like Paris Hilton will be taking time out from milking farm animals in ass crack revealing shorts, getting drunk at the hottest nightclubs, or appearing in homemade night-vision porn to appear in Dark Castle’s HOUSE OF WAX remake. The current uberskank of the moment is in talks to join star Elisha Cuthbert playing one of a group of friends who fall prey to a sinister plot in a small town while on their way to a college football game. Yeah, we’re a long way removed from the Vincent Price version. And contrary to earlier reports the remake will not be 3-D like the original. Too bad because I’m sure a lot of guys out there wish Elisha Cuthbert would pop out of the screen for them. HOUSE OF WAX will open this Halloween. When Paris Hilton’s 15 minutes of fame will expire remains unclear.
Hong Kong director Corey Yuen, the man behind the camera for THE TRANSPORTER and NO RETREAT, NO SURRENDER will direct the big screen version of the fighting video game DEAD OR ALIVE. Those unfamiliar with the video game should just try to envision STREETFIGHTER meets Russ Meyer. Yuen is no stranger to making movies about butt kicking babes as he just directed a Hong Kong movie about just that called SO CLOSE, which can be found at your local video store right now. Personally I think they should just make a movie version of the video game’s spin-off DEAD OR ALIVE BEACH VOLLEYBALL. We’ll just leave that one to Uwe Boll.
Now Hollywood is looking to remake movies that are barely 15 years old. Paramount has commissioned the writers of FACE/OFF to pen another adaptation of Stephen King’s novel PET SEMETARY. The book was already adapted into a hit film back in 1989 by Paramount. I know people’s opinion of that adaptation were mixed at best but there still isn’t any need to remake it this soon.
It’s taken a while but the LORD OF THE RINGS knock-offs are finally on their way. The past month has seen the optioning of the RUNEWORLD novels to be adapted into a feature film directed by Christian “EXTREME OPS” Duguay and THE WHEEL OF TIME book series, preferably to not be made by anyone involved with EXTREME OPS. But wait, it gets better. A big screen version of the ninth-century epic poem BEOWULF is set to begin production soon and UNDERWORLD star Scott Speedman has been grossly miscast in the title role. Producers also want Sean Connery, who is almost legally required to appear in every sword and sorcery film of the past 20+ years, to co-star in the movie. I assume Connery will not be cast as the monstrous Grendel although he does reportedly have the temperament for the part.
Recently the Angelina Jolie spoke to Coming Soon about rumors of a third TOMB RAIDER flick and more or less made it clear that she isn’t interested. Quoting Miss Jolie, "I just don't feel like I need to do another one, because I felt very happy with the last one.” She was the only one that felt that way.
Those waiting to see Keanu Reeve’s CONSTANTINE, the comic flick creator Alan Moore has seemingly disowned because of the changes made by the studio, will have to wait about a year. The film has been pushed back from September 17th to February 11th, 2005. Those that heard reports of Lions Gate’s MAN-THING movie being pulled from the schedule and going direct to video can relax as CHUD reports that the is still scheduled for a theatrical release this Halloween. Word also is that the title monster has very, very little screen time in the movie. I hope that’s not the case because I’ve been dying for a decent swamp monster movie and I like my monster movies to actually have a monster we can see in it.
Rob Zombie’s sequel to HOUSE OF 1,000 CORPSES has a title: THE DEVIL’S REJECTS. Not really anything more to report on this one right now other than I give him credit for giving the movie a title that may make it easy for critics to pan it. I can already see countless negative review using every variant of “reject”, “rejected”, and “rejection” in them.
It’s official. The USA Network will indeed remake SCARFACE. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the USA Network is reinventing the infamous Al Pacino film as a miniseries with a black cast in inner city Los Angeles during the crack epidemic of the 1980s. USA hopes to tailor the four hour miniseries to appeal to the large hip-hop fan base of the original 1983 version; many of whom have grown up to be gangsta wannabes that consider the movie to be more of an instructional film than a cautionary tale.
A few years ago a shot-for-shot remake/spoof of JAWS about a killer “Great White Pine Tree” was released. If you’ve never seen TREES then you really should because it’s surprisingly funny. There’s been a sequel in the works for quite some time now called THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL. This one follows the JAWS formula only this time the town is under siege by killer Christmas trees. This one has a significantly higher budget than the original and looks to be a lot goofier too judging by the trailer that just went online. Check it out for yourself at the official website.
I know I’m not the target audience for an Olson Twins movie (although I have the sneaking suspicion there will be quite a few men, many middle-aged, in the theater although their reasons for being there will have nothing to do with the plot). Still, NEW YORK MINUTE looks beyond awful. The trailer is now online and boy does it look like the ultimate in tweener/brat generation hell. Poor Eugene Levy is relegated to the Principal Rooney role in this shameless FERRIS BUELLER’S DAY OFF rip-off and how many movies are we going to see that have a dog getting abused and flying through the window as someone ducks? Ugh! Witness the horror for yourself at the movie’s official website. I can only hope and pray that this movie will open and close in a New York minute.
- Scott Foy
posted by Scott 3:32 AM | Comments
Visit our news archive.
|
|
|
|
|
|
