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Thursday, August 07, 2003
FoyWonder's News Roundup for August 7, 2003
Good morning, Mr. & Mrs. Fanboy and all the geeks at sea…let’s go to press!
So just how awful is GIGLI? Well, Ben Affleck is now coming right out and saying the movie is terrible and there was just no way of salvaging it with reshoots and editing. And rumor has it that Jennifer Lopez is looking to lay low for the time being due to all the bad publicity, something she isn’t the least bit happy about. Hey, at least Affleck can take the negative publicity on the chin! Now comes word that Columbia may be hoping to fool international audiences into seeing the movie by changing the title to TOUGH LOVE, which ironically enough was the film’s original title. Hey, sounds brilliant to me. After all, everyone in Europe has been hearing all these awful things about this new Jennifer Lopez/Ben Affleck movie called GIGLI but they haven’t heard a thing about this new Jennifer Lopez/ Ben Affleck movie called TOUGH LOVE. Sony itself has basically written off the movie in North America as they scrapped plans for ads that would have continued to promote the film throughout this week. Can’t blame them though. The total cost of the movie between the budget and the marketing is $74 million and thus far it has pulled in less than $5 million. Calling the movie a bomb would be putting it mildly. However, if you still feel like kicking the movie while it’s down then check out this hilarious fake ad poster MSNBC made.
Speaking of potential box office fiascoes, Dimension Films has shut down production of the Kevin “SCREAM” Williamson scribed/Wes Craven directed werewolf flick CURSED for approximately four weeks. This isn’t the first time it temporarily ceased production, as there was a very brief pause in filming back in early June that started all the negative word of mouth about the film’s production. The official line coming out of Dimension is that they put the production on hiatus for two reasons. Number one, they didn’t like the film’s ending so they have commissioned a rewrite (something that happens often in Hollywood but rarely shuts down production for a month). Number two, they weren’t entirely satisfied with the look of the werewolf that F/X master (and a guy no stranger to designing werewolves for the big screen) Rick Baker created and intend to completely redesign it. Last week it was reported that Rick Baker departed the production and this week Dimension announced they would resume production in early September in order to make the movie’s February 13, 2003 release date. According to CHUD’s Smilin’ Jack Ruby, the word leaking out of the crack over at Dimension is that the movie is “completely unwatchable and is the end of Craven's career with Dimension.” Yikes! Of course, if the wild rumor about Rick Baker getting stiffed for $6 million by the studio is true then I suspect we’re going to be hearing a lot more stories about this disaster in the making before it’s all said and done. One more potential headache for the production when it starts up again in September, securing the same crew and cast who may have gone on to work on other projects. Yeah, we’re going to be hearing a lot more about this one in the near future.
Speaking of trouble in Hollywood, director Stephen Norrington apparently got jerked around so much during production of THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN than he’s not only dropped out of directing the proposed live-action AKIRA movie, he’s dropped out of every single Hollywood project he had on his plate. It seems his LXG experience was so miserable that whatever his next film project turns out to be it won’t be made within the Hollywood big studio system. He’ll be back. Mark my words.
According to Robert Englund, the proposed idea for JASON VS. FREDDY to have two different endings has been scrapped and so the ending you see on Friday is the one they’re going with. That would explain why recent test screenings of the movie have been missing the last few minutes so that word of whom the winner is won’t leak out before the Friday release. Personally, I think they should take a page from KING KONG VS. GODZILLA and have the movie end with Freddy and Jason tumbling down a cliff into a body of water and then only Jason reemerges and proceeds to swim home to Camp Crystal Lake. But that’s just me.
I don’t know which one of you requested they make SPECIES 3 but apparently someone in Hollywood listened. SPECIES 3 will begin production in Canada this October for a direct-to-video release sometime next year. Since she’s apparently to busy with She Spies, Natasha Henstridge won’t be back. My God, what does it say about this franchise (or any film franchise for that matter) when Natasha Henstridge has outgrown it? Anyway, according to Filmjerk, the only returning character will be Michael Madsen’s (I guess he doesn’t have anything better to do?) but the number of femme fatale alien beings has been raised. Again quoting Film Jerk, the movie will go something like this. “The first, Sara, is the third generation of part-alien, part-human creatures. A nearly perfect alien, Sara has been raised by renegade biochemistry professor Abbot, and has emerged from her chrysalis, ready to breed. Merciless in her quest for a breeding partner, Sara has astonishing physical strength and the capacity to transform her body into an assortment of aggressive forms, including claws and tentacles. Able to learn at an alarming rate, Sara goes in search of a mate, only to learn that no human is perfect enough to continue her line. Lonely and sad, she soon finds herself hunted by half-breed aliens Amelia and Yosef, and turns to Dean, Abbot's young lab aide, for help in protecting her precious eggs from being harvested by the half-breeds. Her counterpart is Amelia, who has enough alien DNA to make her a ruthless predator, as well as enough human DNA to make her vulnerable to viral diseases. Hell-bent on finding Sara's eggs, Amelia puts out a singles ad, looking for a man with specialized biochemistry skills, and is led straight to Hastings, Dean's horny buddy. Determined to use Hastings to get to Sara, Amelia proves to be a stunning but homicidally sexy woman, willing to do anything to preserve her species and her rapidly decaying body.” Great, so now we have this to go right alongside all those direct-to-video sequels to DRACULA 2000, WISHMASTER, TIME COP, STARSHIP TROOPERS and whatever other potential franchise that pooped out at the box office and are now poised to clutter video store shelves for years to come.
In further proof that Blake Edwards shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near a camera ever again, his remake of 10, to be entitled 10 AGAIN, which was going to star Colin Ferrel and Kristanna “T3” Loken, has reportedly undergone a cast change. Ferrel, who is just way too good looking to be playing the role originated by Dudley Moore, has dropped out of the project, according to Dark Horizons. His rumored replacement – the even hunkier Antonio Banderas! Excuse me but isn’t 10 supposed to be about a beautiful young woman seducing a rather unappealing married loser? Does that last part sounds like a role you’d cast Antonio Banderas in? Is this movie doomed or what?
The latest wacky rumor going around the internet regarding that DUKES OF HAZZARD movie says that Warner Brothers wants Tommy Lee Jones to play bumbling Deputy Roscoe P. Coltraine. Even if it’s a movie, there’s just something wrong in my mind about Tommy Lee Jones playing a bumbling flunky who works for Anthony Anderson.
John Travolta has teamed up with four of his siblings to form a new production company called Travolta Family Films. The company will specialize in making, well obviously, family films. The first on the company’s line-up is a remake of BLACK BEAUTY. Yeah, there’s a movie we really need yet another remake of. It’s like the DRACULA of horse movies it’s been made so many times. Don’t believe me? Look it up on IMDB and see for yourself.
Speaking of unnecessary remakes, the Hollywood Reporter is reporting that Dark Castle, the production company behind the remakes of HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL and 13 GHOSTS as well as the stinker GHOST SHIP, are planning a remake of Vincent Price’s 3-D classic HOUSE OF WAX. The brotherly writing pair of Chris & Chad Hayes has been hired to write the script. This is their first big screen assignment but their TV writing credits include episodes of Booker and Baywatch Nights as well as such Turner Network movies like FIRST DAUGHTER and INVINCIBLE. No word yet on whether the remake will also be filmed in 3-D but all things considered, I wouldn’t get too excited about this one.
Make of this one what you will. According to Variety, a company called Trans-Pacific Media, in association with another company boldly calling itself Sick-O-Scope Motion Pictures, is going to remake five of the grandmaster of gore H.G. Lewis’ films. Why? Why not, I guess? Each remake will be shot for under a million dollars and, get this, in 3-D! Can you even make a 3-D movie these days for under a million dollars? Also, they will be concurrently filmed in 2-D as well. I have a suspicion that may be the only way they get filmed. First up, a remake of WIZARD OF GORE. The other four to be remade are BLOOD FEAST, SHE-DEVIL ON WHEELS, COLOR ME BLOOD RED, and finally GRUESOME TWOSOME. The only thing standing in the way is that annoying little thing called “lack of funding.” Yep, they went ahead and hyped all this without having the funding locked in so chances are none of this will ever happen.
Finally today, I stumbled on an actual plot synopsis for the upcoming direct-to-video movie EL CHUPACABRA, in which hip-hop star Treach battles the goatsucker. “When the bloodthirsty El Chupacabra gets loose in the city, a scientist teams with an animal control officer to catch the deadly creature. While pursuing the murderous goatsucker, the pair encounters a mysterious vigilante determined to bring the monster to a maniacal medical researcher.” No word yet on exactly which role Treach plays but I’m fairly certain it will not be that of the scientist. We’ll all be able to find out for ourselves when EL CHUPACABRA arrives on video and DVD on September 23rd.
–Scott Foy
posted by Christopher 4:59 AM | Comments
Tuesday, August 05, 2003
''Gigli'' takes #2 spot in IMDb worst films list
Looks like Manos, the Hands of Fate will have to settle for third place. The longtime champ of "worst movie ever" (at least according to users of the Internet Movie Database) was dethroned earlier this year by From Justin to Kelly, and now it's been bumped down another notch by Gigli, the Affleck/Lopez vehicle that has attracted an amazing amount of venom this summer.
Even Glitter, the Mariah Carey vanity vehicle, didn't break the top ten (it sits at #15). The execrable Battlefield Earth is all the way down at number 19, though one suspects a bit of ballot-stuffing on both sides, since ten thousand votes were cast. (Gigli only has about 1350 votes at this writing, though its score, 1.5, is lower than Battlefield's 2.3).
For the IMDb's formula on how votes are balanced, see their top 250 list.
posted by Christopher 7:09 AM | Comments
Monday, August 04, 2003
Debbie Rochon takes up the cause of former KKK member and convicted killer?
The New York Post Page Six gossip column reports that William Mark Mize asked scream queen Debbie Rochon to speak out for him after he was sentenced to death in Georgia. Rochon, who has played serial killers in b-movies, isn't actually quoted as saying much about his case. Since her web site links to the story in question, though, there's probably some truth to the blurb.
posted by Christopher 12:04 PM | Comments
''Gigli'' the big loser this weekend
As predicted, the Ben Affleck / Jennifer Lopez vehicle Gigli performed miserably its opening weekend. The picture, which cost $54 million to make (because, one assumes, of the big-ticket salaries of its engaged co-stars), pulled in a scant $3.8 million over the last three days. This is almost exactly the amount earned over the same period of time by Pixar's Finding Nemo, which has been in theaters for ten weeks. (According to Box Office Mojo, Nemo actually fared slightly better than Gigli, which, we're told, rhymes with "steely.")
Whether this will spell box-office death for Jersey Girl, the upcoming Kevin Smith film in which Lopez and Affleck also appear, is uncertain.
Meanwhile, though Spy Kids 3-D was panned by a majority of critics, it continues to draw in viewers and has made nearly twice what it cost to produce. One imagines that Robert Rodriguez will continue to make movies for some time to come – and El Mariachi fans still have Once Upon a Time in Mexico to look forward to later this year.
posted by Christopher 7:37 AM | Comments
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